Coaches Need to Get Better: Including ME

It’s very easy to blame the player for what they’re doing wrong. We’re trying to teach them how to do it. They’re struggling. They get mad. They then get worse at what they’re working on and we simply say “just need to work on it some more.”

And sometimes, that is the answer. Just keep working on it. Many times, we need to work on things a different way. We need to take a different approach. Try a different way of explaining things. The way we’re trying to coach them isn’t working. And it’s not them that needs to do things better. It’s us.

That doesn’t mean we’re bad coaches. We just need to go about things in a different way because the way we’re trying to coach them, doesn’t work for their personality. 

Coaches have a tendency to take the approach that it’s the player’s fault and never look inwards. When a coach never looks inwards, they try to force the player to learn things in a manner that will never work for them. That will only frustrate the player AND the coach, making the situation more difficult.

If something is hard to teach when we’re happy, can you imagine when both parties are frustrated?

I recently had two experiences that reminded me of why coaches need to look inwards more. A PARENT! Yes, a parent, reached out to me and asked me to take a look at something. Putting my loud ego aside, I did. I watched the tape. Sure enough, they were right.

Does that make me a bad coach? No. I know I do everything possible to help players. That’s why I didn’t dismiss the parent. They brought up something that simply wasn’t on the front of my mind. I was focused on other areas of the player’s game. But the player wasn’t succeeding the way they needed to be so I looked into what the parent mentioned.

It would have been easy for me to say “I don’t think that’s an issue” and the non-experienced tennis parents would have trusted me.

But that’s what a coach with a big ego who thinks they know everything would have done. Big ego’s don’t help players get better.

The second experience happened a few days ago. I wrote my opinion on a certain topic in a facebook group. A coach kindly pointed out that I wasn’t thinking about some important details while forming my opinion. Every ounce of my ego wanted to hit back with an infinite amount of comments until he saw my side of things. 

Instead, I remembered I’ve made mistakes in the past. The coach offered up a conversation on the phone. I took him up on his offer and I received a great education that will help me be a better coach. 

So coaches, take a look inwards. We might have a lot of great experience but we’re not perfect. Sometimes it’s us that needs to change and not the player. They might be doing everything possible, but our method of coaching will never help them maximize their potential. Be flexible. Be willing to learn. Do what’s best for the kids. Not your ego.

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On a side note, Feed Spot has done a great job putting together websites about tennis that can help people. Take a look at the following links to get a lot more information that can help you on your tennis journey:

Top Junior Tennis Blogs

Top Tennis Coaching Blogs